15/06/05 The Armchair has gone!

Amazing. Such is the power of the Internet that as soon as I'd mentioned it on the Blog, the armchair vanished into the ether. Perhaps, the owner is an avid reader of my Blog and was embarassed to see that thousands of people a day were laughing at their appalling taste in soft furnishings.
I was thinking today of people I've known through my life with peculiar nicknames, as well as the reasons for being landed with the same nickname.
Here's a few I remember ;
"Big Squashie" ; was given this name after pronouncing "Quasimodo" as "Squashimodo" whilst reading aloud from "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" at school.
"Cheesy" ; became nickname after person in question specifically asked for a Pizza in an Italian Restaurant, "without cheese".
"Peanut" was buying a round and misheard a drink order, screwing up his face and saying "Peanuts?"
"Berjikoff" ; had a strong likeness to the "village idiot" character in Woody Allen's "Love and Death"
"Howker" ; was witnessed frenetically scratching his genital area while half asleep in bed. Derived from the verb, "to Howk"
"Screw" ; can't even remember why. It was a non-sexual reason though!
"The Hawk" ; not sure where this came from. Perhaps he ate small furry mammals and/or had exceptionally good eyesight?
"Doc Photon" ; again, I'm unclear where this came from. Great nickname though!

Why not send me a comment with any hilarious, genuine nicknames and their reasons?
I'm willing to pay absolutely bugger all for the one I deemed to be the most original and funniest.