I would like to point out that the person reflected in this picture taking a photo of the album cover is NOT me, ok?
It is with some regret I must inform you that my much vaunted new cricket career is over...
I played last week for my work's team in a match against Edinburgh University.
Now, it's probably fair to say that most people would tend to view playing cricket as a white-knuckle ride of surging emotions and excitement.
I'm afraid to say the reality is very much at odds with this perception.
I don't think I've ever been more bored for such a sustained period in my life ...ever...(although last week's FA Cup Final was a close second...another "shit on a stick" if ever I saw one).
It was 3 hours of singular joylessness...
The banter was very poor as well...a bit of humour might have saved the day for me...
but inappropriate po-faced seriousness was the demeanor of choice by the participants...
I had attracted a few disapproving glances by turning up in a black t-shirt and black trackie bottoms to play, when everyone else in my team had proper cricketing whites and all the gear....
I was so far down the batting order that I never got a chance to bat, as we had the same pair batting for almost the entire inings...
I wasn't asked to bowl at all either, and was placed at "fine leg" on fielding duty.
This covers an area of the pitch where the ball is least likely to make an appearance...
The idiots...!
Don't they realise I've played one other game in my life and scored 17 runs and had bowling figures of 0-40??
I felt underused...but mostly bored...
On a brighter note, after stocking up for the past few months on Newcastle United shares, I was pleased to see a bidder emerge and pump up the share price...woo hoo!
At the same time, I was disappointed to hear that mild-mannered philanthropist Paul Dance is not hosting a poker game this weekend.
As a result of this I will have to reorganise my spending budget, as I've begun factoring in my projected winnings from these games into my weekly income.
The game cancellation means I will have to tweak my spreadsheets a little...hmph!
I was thinking today that I started off my comedy career at roughly the same time as the SARS outbreak.
We both had dreams of global domination and fame, but things haven't quite worked out the way either of us had planned.
All that's happened is that a few people have felt ill, there's been a bit of projectile vomit and generally not a lot to laugh about...
whereas, with the SARS virus etc etc
ho ho
Tonight I am playing congas with a kind of bluesy jazz combo at Grange Sports Club...
hopefully I will get a few laughs...!
aye thang u!
1 comment:
Hope the gig went well Jimbo
Post a Comment