01/05/06 Darn It....!

Dramatic scenes at "The Crucible" as match referee Don Mitchell collapses with boredom for the 3rd time during the 2006 World Snooker Final.






I very much regret that when the angry gentleman sitting behind me at the Hearts v Celtic game shouted "Linesman! Are you blind, you fat cunt?" that I didn't stand up, then turn round with a furious expression and shout "Oi! For your information pal, that blind, fat cunt is a REFEREE'S ASSISTANT not a LINESMAN!!", shake my head dismissively, then sit down again.
That would have been quite funny, but alas I never thought of it at the time.
So Dott beat Ebdon, and Scotland assume their rightful place in the snooker hierarchy.
We mispend our youth with considerably more expertise than any other snooker playing nation in the world.
It makes up for us not qualifying for the World Cup.
I was rather disappointed that the match finished as early as 1.20am.
It looked at one stage as though it could go on till Tuesday lunchtime ; particularly during a frame which lasted for 75 minutes.
I was hoping that the match would evolve into scenes reminiscent from the film "They Shoot Horse Don't They?" which featured the Dance Marathon Competitions prevalent during the Depression in the 1930s.
People of a certain age will find Mr Dott's voice scarily reminiscent of the bloke who used to read the tales of "Little Nose the Caveboy" on Jackanory on BBC1 in the late 1920s.
Anyway, well done Mr Dott!
I was interested to read in the paper this morning that Dulux Paint are going to approach Peter Ebdon with a view to an advertising contract.
He was brought to their attention when a wag in the audience shouted out "Come on lads, this is like watching paint dry!" during a particularly dull frame in his semi-final match.
...and Jim's "What A Punt!" tip today is Rangers to beat Hibs tonight at Easter Road.
£100 on it, odds 1/2 ON.
It's actually in Hibs' interests to lose this match to keep alive their hopes of a UEFA cup spot, so not even Alex McLeish's ;legendary lack of tactical nous should stand in the way of a convincing victory for Rangers. Am I right, or am I right?