IT Pin-up boy

So anyway, I hated the idea of getting a great big photo on myself on the back page of my work's in-house corporate magazine thing.
However, I convinced myself that it was going to be good publicity for "The Silence of the Trams" show, and agreed to go ahead with it.
Unfortunately, publication was delayed, and the magazine came out A WEEK AFTER the show had finished.
Marvelous...
So in the end, we got no publicity benefit from this whatsoever, and I have to put up with my big, stupid face looking at me from hundreds of copies of the magazine scattered throughout the office.
I've decided to punch the next person in the face who passes me in the office and says "tell me a joke, funny man!".
My cover's been blown, and life will never be the same again in my present workplace.
It's not the best photo I've ever seen of me either.
I'm sporting a ridiculous, self-satisfied smirk.
The only way that a decent photo can be taken of me involves a total ignorance on my part that someone is pointing a camera at me.
Something terrible happens as soon as I pose for a photo.
I used to deliberately do ridiculous toothy grins for school photos to sabotage the shot, and it appears that I never managed to re-adjust my camera image to look natural again.
It's also worth pointing out that the magazine itself is fairly tedious.
In it you can find out interesting facts about the Financial Accounting Section, and read a quick interview with the deputy-manager of the department.
Usually, they've got ambitions to play a round of golf with Tiger Woods, and say that their ideal dinner companions would be Linda Lusardi ("because she's lovely!") and Henry VIII ("because he'd have lot's of interesting stories!").
And apparently "the staff of a company are its most important asset!"
This makes me feel valued, and almost makes it up for having my photo everywhere.
Kanye West may well feel like a complete twat after his impromptu awards speech, but it's trivial compared to my embarassment.
It's tough on Kanye though.
There's nothing worse than trying to be noble to impress a lady, and you just end up embarassing her.
I've got a rich experience of such gestures.
I remember trying to be cool on my new moped in front of an object of my desire, but managed to hit the kerb and fall off the aforementioned vehicle right in front of her.
But even that wasn't as bad as this magazine thing.