26/03/08 Now Hear This...

I had a gig at The Stand on Monday.
I’d say it went down pretty well, but the performance was rubbish.
I’d intended doing a high energy babbling style, trying to cram loads of material into a manic 10 minutes, but then changed my mind for no apparent reason just before I went on.
Also, I fumbled a lot of lines.
This was odd because I’d spent a lot more time than I usually do going over what I was going to say, and made a few edits and stuff.
So that’s what you get for being diligent.
I got a more than a few disapproving tuts at some of the “questionable taste” material as well. That doesn’t usually happen as most audiences regard the material as more idiotic than offensive.
Anyway, a few new things went well, so mustn’t grumble too much.
I’ve always been a big fan of global warming, particularly the predicted rising of sea levels.
I appreciate this will likely lead to an environmental catastrophe, but I still look forward to visiting my friend Iain when it all comes to pass.
Iain is a true anorak, and has successfully climbed every “Munro” in Scotland.
To mark this achievement, he has a large map of Scotland in his kitchen with hundreds of tiny flags pinned in it to represent every Munro he has successfully “bagged”.
I think it would be hilarious if rising sea levels caused a number of Iain’s conquered peaks to lose their Munro classification, (ie they are no longer at least 3000 ft above sea level).
I’d take great delight in removing the appropriate number of flags from the map and casting them to the floor as Iain looks on in stunned silence.
I know what you’re thinking….the satisfaction at witnessing a geeky friend’s upset hardly compensates for the accompanying global devastation…
but that’s just your opinion.
My switch from Betfair to Stock Trading has made a fantastic start.
I bought then sold Lonmin for a good profit (selling just before it dropped like a stone), then transferred everything onto the Royal Bank of Scotland, guessing (correctly at the time of going to print) that the Banks had hit their bottom value last week.
It’s shot up this week so I am sitting on a great big profit.
It was a great manoeuvre, reminiscent of Richard Burton jumping from one cable car to another seconds before the first cable car explodes and plummets to the ground.
It was just like that.
I miss the instant gratification of winning a Betfair bet, but the stocks thing feels like a more adult relationship.
..and yes what you’re thinking is absolutely correct…what a wanker…!!!!