19/09/05 Small Change

Since I discovered that I have approximately 800 squillion pounds worth of loose change in my flat, I've used this ridiculous surplus to initiate a clever new training regime.
On a daily basis, I fill a rucksack full of change, (in proper little bank bags), and then proceed to cycle (rather unsteadily) to work.
If I was to get knocked off my bike, (as nearly happened this morning), I would hit the ground with a great thud carrying all the extra weight on my back. In all likelihood the bag would burst and thousands of coins would cascade all over the road. I'd be suspected of being a suicide bomber, using the coins for shrapnel.
At lunchtime, I walk up the entire length of Dundas St to the bank.(It's a steep continuous hill, reminiscent of the south-west face of the Eiger, in case you didn't know...)
By the time I get to the bank I am puffing and sweating like a racehorse. I usually make it to the bank just before midday and manage to avoid the busy lunchtime queues.
As I waited in the queue yesterday carrying my bumper load of change, the bank suddenly became very busy with about 15 people waiting behind me.
One teller was occupied in an intractable debate with an Italian female who was trying to organise some complicated transaction involving a large number of ravelling cheques.
There was a clearly audible groan from the queue as I strode up to the teller and began to load a multitude of loose change bags onto the counter.
There was nothing I could do to improve my popularity in this difiicult situation.
I sure as hell wasn't going to carry all the change back down to the office again. I'd no choice. I felt like turning round and explaining this to the rest of the queue, (possibly through the medium of song?)...
However, I didn't do this. It seemed a risky strategy. I was comforted by the realisation that the majority of people in the queue were obviously "fresher" students opening new bank accounts. If they weren't waiting in the queue, they'd just be sitting in cafes, smoking cigarettes and talking animatedly about "pop" music and computer games.
I was relieved to feel that I wasn't causing serious problems to the economy by my selfish change conversion practice.